Becoming The Best Me

Being Kickass is really about being the best version of myself that I can be. This is a big, broad, sweeping statement that makes me sound kind of cliche. The truth is, all I want in life is to be . . . me. Ideal me works in a creative field were my schedule is flexible and just being myself is resume enough. In this perfect world I influence people and have an extensive group of friends who are from all walks of life. Ideal me shops at the market in the morning, works a couple of hours in the afternoon, meets friends for coffee, and then heads back home to make dinner for family with the food that I grew in my own garden. I know that this lifestyle does exist. I know that it isn't all butterflies and unicorns. Here is the question. How? I am not sure.

Right now I spend an ungodly amount of time waffling. It starts in the morning with, "I am going to be a Graphic Designer". At lunch I am not so sure Graphic Design offers the kind of flexibility I am looking for, maybe I should focus on being a writer. By dinner I am thinking,"Well sure everybody wants to be a writer, but is that realistic?". Then I decide I should go back to school and get a "real job". No more than five minutes later I am repulsed by that idea. By the end of the night I haven't actually made any progress but instead given myself a headache.

I just need to DO! Stop thinking so damn much and do something, anything. That is what this blog is about being someone who does. So here we are I am 13,500 words into a novel. I spend hours a week looking for Graphic Design jobs. I work nearly full time. And then I am still trying to stay on top of my weight loss goals. I feel a little like I am running at full speed on a treadmill. Sure I am exhausted but I haven't moved forward an inch.

I have made some strides. Thomas and I did move to Seattle as promised. I am down 25 lbs. and still losing, slowly, but none the less. I feel like there are more opportunities here which is reassuring but I want some promise that everything will be ok.

What will I do? More of everything. When I want to paint I will paint. When I want to write I will write. I will be successful come hell or high water.

Weightloss update.

Hello again!

Well I believe we are on week 9 or so now and I am very slowly still losing the weight. Altogether I have lost 13 lbs now. The main difference I am seeing is that my stomach and butt are tightening. I recently changed jobs were I went from say 10 hours a week to 40. So I have been keeping a lot busier which makes exercising difficult. After I get done standing all day the last thing I want to do is go for a walk. I keep hoping that the work is making up for some of my missed work outs.
I am pretty sure there is some hardcore ab muscle if you could find it under the layer of flab. So now we just need to reveal it in all of it's glory. My husband who started at the same time as I did has now lost about 25 lbs. by riding his bike upwards of 15 miles 5 days a week. Together we are feeling healthier. Here are some recent photos.





I swear I look drunk in all of my photos. I promise I am not!

Bye Black Angus!

You may have noticed that for the last week and a half or so I have been MIA. Well big changes have been happening in my life. I quit my job of five years at Black Angus. I have looked forward to the day when I snap, yell at who ever has pissed me off, and triumphantly quit on the spot. Oh but did I mention that I am too careful for all of that fun. So, what did I do? Discreetly get an interview with Starbucks, get hired, and then graciously give my two weeks. God, why can't I be awesome and impulsive. So anyway, after all of my complaining, griping, and dreaming of the day I quit I am sad and sentimental. I love all of my friends I have made and in a strange way I will even miss the drama.

I have always made Starbucks into the pinnacle of the minimum wage employment. As I am quickly learning it is just a job. Pedaling someone else's products again. Don't get me wrong I am thankful for my new job, but it has made me realize I have settled again. I have chosen to take the safe road again. I am a trained graphic designer and damned if I am going to waste my 20,000 dollars in school loans by occasionally using Photoshop. No, I have more to offer this world than a smile and the ability to use a cash register. After my first few days of training, I have a new found respect for Baristas there is so much crap to learn. Seriously, people take their coffee very seriously. People can take what was a latte and turn it into some sort of magical and elusive unicorn warmed to exactly 175 degrees. It is the perfect excuse for some people who yearn for control to do just that control. Fortunately most of my customers thus far have been very patient as I learn as I go.

I miss the fact that I could come to work and essentially could deal with any situation and now I am learning how to sweep the lobby the Starbucks way. Isn't there a job out there that just consists of being paid to be creative? Oh wait that is called being an Artist. Now how do I get people to pay me? So what is my end game plan? Writing or Design. I am still looking at going back to school for English. If I were to write a book what do you think I should do mystery, children's, or sattire?

My last days at the BA. . .












I will miss you guys!